Redskins defensive tackle, Albert Haynesworth, following his alleged comments after a recent indictment on sexual abuse charges, is a prime candidate for the Dimwit of the Year Award. In an incident that occurred in February, Haynesworth, allegedly caressed a waitress’ breast, and then reportedly stated that the waitress was just upset because he had a white girlfriend. To further his own ill repute, he added that the waitress only made the allegation against him because she was “a little Black girl” and furthermore “I don’t even like Black girls.” Oh, how I would love to say “N-word, please!” but I won’t. Instead, I will ponder how any man – especially one birthed by a Black woman – can make such an asinine statement.
The issue of interracial relationships is a never-ending subject. On Thursday, it was a hot topic on The View. That discussion concerned a statement made by sultry singer Jill Scott in a recent Essence Magazine Commentary. After learning that a close male friend of hers had married a white woman Scott said “I felt my spirit … wince. My face read happy for you . . . but the sting was there.” Scott further explained that her inner reaction was not one of racism, but the unforgettable memory of the American history of slavery, when Black women were raped and maligned in numerous ways while the white woman was revered as the ultimate prize.
One of The View’s co-hosts, Whoopie Goldberg, remarked that “I find it extraordinary that in 2011 people still have this issue… that slavery stuff.” Well, Whoopie — WAKE-UP CALL! In spite of how far our nation has come on race relations, we still have miles to go. And as unfortunate as it is, the matter of race and interracial relationships is still an issue. It cannot be erased like chalk on a blackboard and closing our eyes, crossing our fingers, and wishing it away won’t make it go.
The truth hurts, but the worse lies are the lies we tell ourselves. Even a blind person can see the obvious. When men with a Haynesworth mentality date or marry a white woman, even if it means demeaning all Black women with blatant, ignorant statements like those he allegedly made, they feel that they have arrived. And Black women cannot help but feel the sting while wondering if men like him are still putting white women on the metaphorical pedestal, and imagining that they have won the Superbowl. Landed on Forbes List. Bought the Lamborghini.
The issue is not whether there is really a chance for a heart-to-heart connection among Black men and white women or Black women and white men. Love happens and it can be colorblind. However, Black women are tired of being offended by disparaging remarks and blatant disrespect. Regardless of what may be said privately among family and friends, you rarely hear a prominent Black woman publicly lambast all Black men. Men who direct such contemptuous statements at Black women either don’t care or fail to realize that public condemnation is a bitch, and it is as bastardly an act as dissing an entire race of women including one’s own Black sister, daughter and mother.
